At first glance it looks like a super-shady porn site, the kind that will have your credit card details and CVA number hacked in under nine seconds. But no, it’s only Steve Hili’s new satirical project, Naughty Malta’s Sexy Secrets. And we can already tell you, no-one’s safe.
The Facebook page, which cropped up on various newsfeeds just in time for the August ennui, purports to share real sex confessions which will eventually be used during an actual theatre show. That’s right. Move over Bormla Babes.
Interspersed with real confessions along the lines of ‘I ended up naked, hiding in my girlfriend’s father’s car booth’, which are presumably sent in by actual followers of the page, the seriously funny bits creep in. Such as the one claiming that Gordon Manché is next up for a penis extension.
This is not exactly a first for Hili, who’s known to push sexual boundaries with his comedic style. His adult panto, usually taking place in summer, is only one example. Needless to say, audiences’ expectations are sky-high for the man who stole the mankini from Borat.
Oh yeah – and if you happen to see any Times of Malta reports on the newsfeed, do take them with a pinch of salt. It’s only Hili having his fun. Bets are on about who’s filing the first criminal libel suit. Our money is on a certain pastor…
Meantime, if you’ve always dreamed of having your best sexual moments, or maybe the worst, acted out live on stage, Hili encourages you to contribute your own anonymous confessions. There’s even an anonymous online form just for the purpose. But seeing this is the TikTok generation and the island’s full of exhibitionists, we wouldn’t be surprised if people just started signing off with their real names anyway.